Not happy with giving Prince Philip a knighthood, the most recent out-of-the-blue government move is a suggestion it might just pull the census.

Fairfax Media reported the survey, which has been collecting data on Australians for more than 100 years, could be replaced by a smaller sample survey. It asked the government whether the 2016 census would go ahead, and the answer was a little shady.

“The government and the Bureau of Statistics are consulting with a wide range of stakeholders about the best methods to deliver high quality, accurate and timely information on the social and economic condition of Australian households,” Kelly O’Dwyer, a government spokeswoman said. That is no denial.

The compulsory census, which takes a look at the state of Australian households on a single night every five years, has been an institution since its national rollout in 1911. It has seen its share of new religions, irreverent tweets and family bonding — even if that is with your three fat, hairy, alcoholic flatmates.

The census is not something that can be thrown in the garbage bin like free doctor’s visits. It is who we are and worth every cent of the estimated A$440 million cost, plus extra costs for the move to online. Not convinced? Let’s take a look at why the Australian census is the greatest document to ever be crowdsourced.

It made Jedi Knights a religion

In 2001, more than 70,000 people identified with a Jedi-related religion after a widespread Internet campaign, calling on supporters of Star Wars to show their support.

“If there are enough people in the country, about 10,000, who put down the same religion, it becomes a fully recognised and legal religion,” an email at the time said. This was not to be the case, when the Australian Bureau of Statistics announced anyone referring to themselves as a Jedi would be classed as “undefined.”

In 2006, the number of Jedi had dropped to 58,053. There are still Jedi to this day.

It tried to make Pastafarian a thing

Alright, so everyone had a good ol’ laugh at the Jedi phase. But when the pastaferian influx came along, no one was seeing the funny side. This form wasn’t for jokes, Australia, it was to provide vital information to the government to make important decisions. Well, that’s what the government wanted us to believe.

A pastaferian is someone who belongs to The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster and wears a strainer on their head.

Politician Bill Shorten said in 2011, he was not impressed: “You hear all sorts of discussion in the social media about calling yourself a pastaferian, which is a worshipper of pasta … That is funny, but we would rather you fill in the census correctly.”

But the Australian Pastafarian Lobby (APL) has still not given up the fight. Census or no census, they are still throwing around fettuccine in the hope they are recognised in the 2016 census.

“Have you been touched by His Noodly Appendage? Well its time to stand up and be counted me heartys –- lets honour His Noodlyness the Flying Spaghetti Monster and join the campaign of the Australian Pastafarian Lobby to get Pastafarianism as a choice of religion in the 2016 Australian census,” APL spokesperson Henry Morgan wrote in a petition.

It has assisted in medical discoveries

In the 1911 census, it was found that deaf-mutism was a common medical issue in 10 to 14-year-olds. It was then picked up as affected 20 to 24-year-olds in the census ten years later. Using the census figures from 1911, 1921 and 1933, Australian statistician Oliver Lancaster found there was a peak in deaf mutes born in 1898 and 1899 during a rubella outbreak leading to the disturbing numbers in the census decades later.

“This was the first time in the world that the link between rubella and congenital problems with unborn children was firmly established,” according to the Bureau of Statistics.

Because of this guy’s efforts

A census collector in 1954, F. McTighe, went to great lengths to get the survey in the hands of Australians. He would have loved the Internet. This extract from Informing a Nation sums it up:

His vehicle frequently had problems. The generator “burst out,” he borrowed another, he had to fix his brakes, later the “water pump bearing completely gave out,” the pulley on the generator collapsed, the engine boiled, but still he managed to borrow and improvise parts and keep his vehicle going. His trials included fixing the water pump gasket in the dark.

As he pressed on, the car had “continuous blow-outs.” He borrowed another pump, borrowed patches, he bogged the car in sandy creek beds twice.

He went from “daylight to almost midnight as a rule, taking the Census and [car] registrations.”

Household bonding

There is nothing that brings people together like sitting down to fill in a 60-page government document. After a few census night beverages with your housemates, it becomes difficult to remember what country you were born in, where you lived last year and if Jeff still resides in the garage. The sharing of your salary with a flatmate also makes the fight over rent division more fun, as does finding out Jeff lost his job a year ago.

Then if things aren’t at peak bond, try putting on the table question 48: “In the last week did the person spend time doing unpaid domestic work for their household?” Amazing.

The world would be a duller place…

The star of the census is undoubtedly the Twitter account Census Australia, which kicked off during the 2011 census. With humorous tweets mixed with stats, Aussies took an instant shine to a government organisation finally nailing social media.

Politicians aren’t the only ones who talk gibberish. According to Census data 105 people speak an invented language.

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) July 25, 2011

@AndyCronin, we can teach you, but we’d have to charge.

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) July 25, 2011

1,081,279 people earn $2,000 or more per week in Australia – not one of them has decided to become Batman.

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) February 5, 2015

If #JohnFarnham comes out of retirement again, he’ll join the 31,765 Australians aged 61 who work part time.

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) June 8, 2011

According to #Census data, 2974 people in #Australia list their occupation as Slaughterer.

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) May 31, 2011

Census data reveals Tuesday is one of seven days in a week. It follows Monday and precedes Hump Day. Happy Tuesday everyone.

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) August 15, 2011

…and the goat farmers would be forgotten

Fifty Shades of Goat… Census data reveals there are 223 Goat Farmers in Aus. #ReplaceAMovieTitleWithGoat

— Census Australia (@ABSCensus) February 12, 2015

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